The Lanternjack – Hussy

So, what do you get when you cross a skinny, shirtless leather-pants-wearing wanna-be porn star, two guys that look like they just won Al Jourgenson look alike contests, and another shirtless rocker who’s never seen in public unless he’s wearing a goat mask? Well, you’re either at a really oddball fetish party or you’re taking in the simple grandeur that is Detroit’s Lanternjack.
Describing The Lanternjack musically is simple enough, as I can think of a large handful of adjectives to describe them off the top of my head: dirty, gritty, loud, brash, catchy, obnoxious, bold, rude, simple, drunk, punk, rawk, metal, fuzzy … The Lanternjack experience, however, is something else altogether. Singer Flying Johnny Flash is a showman – a skinny, drunken hornball with a very simple agenda: piss people off and get a piece of ass while he’s at it. The term “four chords and the truth” comes to mind while listening to Hussy, and although The Lanternjack’s ‘truth’ isn’t necessarily intelligent or political, it serves its purpose nonetheless. I mean, drunk and horny people need music, too.
The debauchery begins with the two-and-a-half minute dirge of “I Got Life,” where Vivian Camero’s crunching guitars and Larry Lava’s fuzzy, thumping bass create a dirty, crawling, almost sexual vibe that’s formidably backed by the pounding of the Holy Goat. I wish I could’ve lost my virginity with this playing, ’cause the pulsating, grinding image it puts in my head would make this the ultimate baby-making music. “21st Century Whore” is another raw, foot-tapping rocker with a sing-along chorus that manages to draw from both the Stooges and Cheap Trick. Of course, the guys manage to sneak in a punk ode to the art of lovemaking with “Bing Bang” while also injecting their own brand of chewy goodness into The Jesus and Mary Chain’s “Teenage Lust.” The rest of the disc takes those formulas and runs with them, posting up everything from the short blasts of punk on the title track to throbbing metal guitar line and stick-in-the-head chorus of “Oh Man.”
Bottom line, the best element of The Lanternjack is the fact that the band can be so raw sounding and still be as catchy as any pop song on the market today. Short, sweet, and to the point, Hussy is a perfect representation of the “loud, fast and hard” sexual vibe that The Lanternjack give off. Rock on, boys – rock on.